You’re right … it’s been a while since I posted anything. I’ve been kind of dreading this process to document the following milestones:
My son’s senior year of high school:
Yes, tears were shed before and during and even afterwards of all these moments.
I never imagined living through these major milestones without Torey. The Senior celebration day consisted of parent involvement. Moms were given roses while Dads were asked to throw the first pitch all together. Each family walked out on the field together while a track of our sons’ thoughts played on the speaker system. I was asked who I would like to choose to throw the first pitch in place of Torey. I said I’d do it – it was a total failure, but it garnered enough attention to have been placed on the last slide of the Baseball Banquet slide show! I was cracking up at myself, mortified for not throwing a straight ball towards Das. It went left and all he could do was shake his head! LOL!
Prom was an interesting lead up. I won’t go into detail because Das would kill me, but it went well! He’s a responsible young man and did not disappoint. We rented a tux and him and his date looked AMAZING! I even made a corsage and a boutonniere, but Das didn’t present any of this and instead chunked the flowers. Yes, Das – I put this out there. My efforts were NOT appreciated! LOL! I still love you though.
The Baseball Banquet was sweet – held at the Stonebriar Country Club in early May. The boys were all so well dressed, and everything was good! I still chuckle at the fact I was called out on the last slide! Thank you, Hebron High School Baseball Booster Club!
GRADUATION! Ummm … wow. So many people made the best effort to be there for such a monumental moment! Many thanks to all of them!
The ceremony took place at UNT – Tran was gracious enough to drive me there after flying in from Guadalajara. (I have a phobia of driving on highways – this has been going on for the last 7 years or so … this isn’t Torey’s loss related, but the loss exasperated the anxiety. THANK YOU, TRAN! The ceremony celebrated 881 graduates within two hours – it was pretty amazing!
The graduation party was held at ChopShop in Carrollton, and it was well received – everyone had a good time! To me the cake was the highlight even though the food and drinks were equally up to par!
Why am I mentioning all of this?
I felt T-Mitch’s energy in all of these moments. He was there to cheer his son on. He was. There were so many signs that I wish I had documented at the time. I’m just comforted to have been around loved ones – especially our people from Texarkana. You know who you are. Thank you from the bottom of our souls!
I have some lessons learned from these experiences:
- Always have Kleenex on you
- Be prepared for your son to give you the finger when he doesn’t want to be photographed (it’s okay – we raised him that way!)
- Be prepared for girls who are named … well no I won’t finish this sentence now – you can DM me if you’re really interested
- You’re stronger than you think
- You can still celebrate while you’re grieving
- Treasure the folks who showed up on a monumental occasion
I will admit – the most recent dreams I’ve had of T-Mitch have been confrontational. All of this time I thought I was feeling his thoughts, but after speaking to a therapist I realized I’m just channeling my own thoughts and blaming T-Mitch. He always told me to move on if we ever broke up or if one of us passes away – it’s not him speaking to me any longer. It’s me.
I need to speak to myself on TOREY’s level. Writing this has been therapeutic. I don’t expect anyone to truly understand.
If you took the time to read this, then thank you!
It’s a process.